... you can make your way around five different malls without a map.
...you have friends from 10 different countries.
... you can tell as soon as there’s a sand storm a’comin’.
... the taxi driver knows where you’re going.
... letters in local newspapers no longer seem like the rantings of the insane.
... you’ve stopped complaining about people tailgating you in the fast lane, and started complaining about people driving too slowly in the fast lane.
... you can recite the recorded Arabic welcome message from the RTA taxi number, word for word, and with a flawless accent.
... you say the summer ‘isn’t that hot.’
... you look round the lobby of a five-star hotel and yawn.
... you get excited and dance around whenever it rains.
... you don’t know how to clean your own apartment.
... you know that ladies’ nights are actually all full of blokes.
... you find it a real challenge to paint your own nails.
... you’ve forgotten how to fill up your car with petrol.
... you don’t know when you last walked more than 100 metres in one go.
... you consider anything below 30° to be ‘cardigan weather’.
... you think Ski Dubai is a perfectly normal concept.
... you’ve heard the same Dubai urban myths from 10 different people.
And you know someone’s definitely not a Dubai resident when…
1... they’re petrified of Sheikh Zayed Road.
2... they don’t know what baba ganoush/tabouleh/fatoush is.
3... they’re shocked at the idea of getting a cab from one side of the road over to the other.
4... they get their Burj’s confused (Al Arab and Dubai, that is).
5... they’ve been on the Big Bus Tour – and know more about Dubai than actual expats.
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